Daniel has been real sick over the past week. He went to the doctor twice, and the hospital twice. Today he was admitted. He's diagnosed with bacterial meningitus. I know he's gonna be okay now, but I can't help think about what life would be like without him.

I'd probably get his stuff. I'd get my own car. I'd probably get a cat because my parents would want to cheer me up. I wouldn't have to worry about him, or what he thinks of me. I wouldn't have to live up to him so much. He wouldn't have to put up with my idiocies.

I'd be alone. I've been with him my whole life. It's hard too imagine him not there. I've always been able to talk to him about most stuff. I had every class with him up until seventh grade. I'd miss him terribly.

I don't want any calling me, or IMing me, telling me that he's gonna be okay. I know he is. I just needed to vent.

So apparently people think I'm gay from the moment they meet me. Weird stuff. I guess it's cool that no one asks me about it.

It's weird being out. For the past couple years, I've had to suppress my feelings. And now I wanna shout it out, but I don't know how. What I want is to be a good rolemodel for other closeted guys, so they can get the courage to realize that it's okay to be gay. I guess those are pretty high aspirations, but it shouldn't be too hard. Anyways, I gotta go to work soon.

I love waking up in the morning, with the sun shining through my curtains. I love how the hair on my arms has turned blonde. I love how tan I've gotten. I love having money.

Not much up today. I plan on not doing much either.

I recently learned how famous my dad is in the IBM world. I googled him and was amazed. Joey Bernal, if anyone's intrested.

Anyways, I gotta go. My family wants me to come outside and swim.

I've solved my Symphonic band going to Austria dillema. I'm quitting.

I've found something that is profoundly better than band. Besides I've always wanted to go to a football game as a normal person, lol.

Theatre has struck a chord in my soul, and I want to be submersed in it.

So I guess you could say I'm not quitting, I'm just changing majors.